The Bold Voice of J&K

Invaluable Gift

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PURAN CHAND SHARMA

In our worldly life there exists a very popular and interesting practice of exchange of gifts, presents awards and donations etc. on some special occasions which become instrumental in fortifying our mutual relationship and maintaining social relations. It will be interesting for the readers to understand from the following moral story:-
“A newly married daughter came to her parent’s house on her maiden visit and the family extended her the best of reception and the festivities continued for a week. Parents managed and arranged all those things which perfectly suited to their daughter’s liking and taste. At the time of daughter’s departure to her In- Law’s house, Father gave her a big packet of Incense sticks of good quality and lovingly advised her to urgently light this incense stick while going for worship and prayer in your in-law’s house. On seeing this mother spoke to her husband, ‘what are you doing? , does anybody give incense sticks to the daughter moving back to in-law’s house for the first time after marriage. Father acted promptly, put his hand in pocket and whatever money he laid hand at, quickly gave to the daughter.
As soon as the daughter arrived at her in-law’s house, her Sasu maa very promptly and keenly looked at the things and presents she had been bestowed in lieu of her maiden visit to the parental home. She happened to see a packet of incense sticks which made her grim faced. Being internally upset she asked daughter – in- law to use these Agarbattis tomorrow in her daily pooja. Next day morning while sitting for Pooja she opened the packing of incense sticks and saw a hand written letter of his father whose text made her too emotional with tears rolling down in torrents. Therein it was narrated ” Dear daughter, This agarbatti burns itself, but emits and spreads soothing and captivating aroma all around in the house and it also charges the surrounding environment with palatable aroma. Just possible sometimes you may get upset with your husband due to certain issues or you may take offence with your mother and father in law, you may have bit of problem with your Devar and Nanad, at times some near and dear may shout at you, you may take umbrage with your close neighbours on trivial matters, in such critical times you may please turn focus on and keep this letter of mine in the centre of your thought process. The contents and the underlying message and the positive piece of life changing advice aroused her tender emotions , she burst into tears and started weeping bitterly. Sasu Maa rushed to her swiftly to understand as to what had happened to the newly wedded Bahu, her husband and Sasur also promptly reached in the Pooja room where Bahu was terribly sobbing, to take stock of the situation in its entirety. Her husband enquired about the cause of her weeping so severely. Sasur also asked her to precisely speak about the cause of this nasty happening. Sasu Maa started closely looking for any weird thing around. In this process she laid hand at a well hand written letter of Bahu’s father, just after reading the contents of the letter, she briskly hugged her terribly sobbing Bahu and passed the letter to Sasur ji, who handed over the letter to his son for reading it out. After understanding the whole situation , entire family was grossly taken aback. Sasu Maa addressed to all members of the family and asked them to get this letter framed, this is the highly phenomenal and the invaluable gift of my Bahu and keep it adjoining to the Pooja room. This framed letter of Bahu’s father shall always beautify and incessantly spread bewitching fragrance and positive vibes in nook and corner of the house. Further this framed letter by virtue of its lovely and meaningful words would go a long way in purifying and providing lovely fragrance not only to the entire house but also to the surrounding environment. The bundle of Aggarbattis may exhaust in due course of time but the moral lesson and their indelible impression would have lifelong impact which can transform lives, strengthen family system making it a rich source of moral education and positive sanskars.”
Crux message of this anecdote is that the parents and the entire family as a whole do have the opportunity and the needed ability to inculcate life values and the constructive traits in the kids right from the beginning with utmost care and devotion despite it being a colossal challenge amidst the uncontrolled usage of ever distracting electronic and social media when even a less than one year baby looks for a mobile as prop to feed milk and in most of the cases breast feeding is avoided by young mothers for maintaining their figure. Nothing to worry about, we need to be little focussed and determined to change the scenario for better future of our progeny. In earlier times when our joint family system was intact and well in place prior to the exposure of western culture and modern lifestyle and in general, the set up and system of the family was such that by and large three to four generations were living together wherein our finer cultural values, manners, traditions were passing on to the next upcoming generation in a natural process. At this critical juncture it has come to naught due to the changed social milieu. This is not something impossible but probably achievable by a bit of positive initiative and concerted efforts in the form of regular weekly family assembly for two hours inclusive of children. No sermons to be given but healthy GUP CHHUP. Some good bhajans, patriotic songs, poems, Inspiring stories of our national heroes ,Gods, social workers etc. healthy interaction with children involving them in discussion like in the last week what good you saw, what good you heard and what good you studied, then enjoying lunch or dinner together. This would be a kind of counselling within the family and in the end a pep talk by father or Grandfather which would strengthen bonding and mutual trust. Being united and in togetherness we shall accomplish the cherished goal.
Jai Hind

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