Surjit Singh Flora
Doubt is darkness-not in the sense of righteousness against evil. Uncertainties often plague a human being, making it difficult, if not impossible, for them to trust their own instincts. As a consequence, they are only able to see and experience the world as a place that is dangerous and menacing. We can understand that their fear of taking chances will leave them vulnerable to the world. This fear will be so intense that it will be highly unlikely for them to ever reach their full potential and fulfill their own destiny. However, this is just a small part of the problem.
Doubt can manifest as an unyielding burden, subtly infiltrating our thoughts and prompting us to second-guess our own abilities. It is an aspect of the human experience, however, and not fundamentally negative. It encourages us to engage in critical thinking and to make decisions that are well-informed. It is essential to find a balance between doubt and confidence, ensuring that neither paralyzes us nor obscures our judgment.
Doubt can be likened to a disease, consuming a person from the inside out, much like a worm. It makes the human mind hollow. Even if a person appears perfect from the outside, once the seed of doubt has sprouted inside the mind, it can be detrimental. Doubt always ensnares a suspicious person. His focus on others prevents him from appreciating his present. As a result, doubt infiltrates his mind and profoundly impacts his heart, sometimes leading to mental illness.
Never let doubt enter the mind; when it starts, try to resolve it as soon as possible. Instead of broadening its reach through conversation and rumors, strive to resolve it promptly. The most delicate relationship is that of a husband and wife. Doubt is also a reason for bitterness or breakups in most relationships. While we claim that times have changed in today’s world, our friends’ perspectives have remained unchanged. We ourselves want to live freely, but we cannot allow our life partner to do the same. If there is any doubt, then we should definitely talk to each other face-to-face so that later, the other person cannot run away from what we said. Many of our projects fail because of suspicions about money, both outside and within our partnerships.
If we dare to connect any relationship, business, or person with ourselves without trying to tie them down, then the results will be good. When we consider adapting to others solely for our own benefit, it can be disheartening. We also need to adjust ourselves slightly to accommodate the other person. We cannot tolerate conditions and restrictions to the extent of disrupting our relationships. Doing so only allows us to spend our days, not to enjoy them.
Domestic suspicion is commonly seen. Sometimes mistakes happen in our own lives too, but we sow the seeds of suspicion to blame others for them. If we habitually harbor doubts during every conversation, it indicates a need for personal growth. Avoid relying too much on others for your thoughts and comprehension, as this could lead you to succumb to suspicion. It is better to get rid of suspicion quickly than to burn yourself inside.
Suspicion can even lead to murders. What is the use of killing precious lives in a moment and then regretting it? If everything is tested with wheat, then nothing comes out of it. A person, being a victim of ego, does not know how many negative thoughts he has tied up in his mind about others. Without listening to others and drawing our own conclusions, we not only harm our own souls but also cause trouble for others. The structure of our mind also makes it difficult to escape doubt once it establishes itself.
How can I overcome self-doubt?
A Buddhist monk was studying at a renowned temple. He dedicated himself to intense training each day, striving to overcome his inner demons. He realized that he could not silence the occasional voices that crept in, whispering that he would never be enough, that he would never amount to anything, that he was worthless, etc.
He approached his teacher, a highly respected practitioner of Buddhism who had imparted numerous valuable lessons to him. His face flushed with embarrassment as he asked, “Master, how do you silence the doubtful voices in your head?”
With a sympathetic smile on his lips, the master glanced back and spoke to him.
“I concur with them.”
Regardless of your courage or understanding of yourself, self-doubt will persist. Understanding the origin is essential to overcoming it. Who caused you to feel inferior, what led to your sense of insignificance, and why? Are you currently experiencing the same situation? What has changed? What could still be influencing you and evoking those emotions today?
In my youth, I possessed a remarkable talent for art. I never gave much thought to the significance of creating art; I simply engaged in it (the scribbles of my three-year-old self on my mom’s old cooking recipes can confirm this). Growing up with two scientifically minded parents, who built their careers in practical fields, started to shape my perspective on artists. I was unaware of this aspect of myself, yet I recognized that accepting praise for my art was challenging. Even after I received recognition for my artistic talents, I continued to downplay them. After nearly twenty-five years of existence on Planet Earth, I have come to understand that art is one of my talents, one of the most valuable contributions I can make to the world. Does that imply that I am DaVinci? No. Does this mean that I still value it, even in the face of all the opinions suggesting otherwise?
For me, that answer is a definite yes. Ultimately, the decision is yours to make. Is your passion truly valuable? Is that everlasting flame that burns worth letting go? Each of us is empowered to choose how we utilize it.
Explore the underlying negative thoughts-I understand your desire for them to cease. However, it is essential to understand the reasons behind your thoughts initially. The reason you possess them lies in the evolution of humanity. Our ancestors had to consistently adopt a negative mindset for survival; a gatherer with positive thoughts would perish, and that would be the end. Your brain has adapted to the knowledge it has accumulated over millions of years.
Embrace the reality that thoughts will inevitably arise; resisting them will only exacerbate the situation. It’s similar to trying to steer clear of unwanted thoughts. Resisting your thoughts often intensifies their impact. Embrace them as an inherent aspect of who you are.
Take a step back and observe them-begin a meditation practice and learn to distance yourself from your thoughts while tuning in to them. Learn to perceive them as a singular, foolish, evolutionary voice within your mind. When negativity surrounds you, simply take a step back and find humor in it. Perceive the voice as a playful jest and engage with it creatively. To master the art, one must learn to take their thoughts lightly. Understand that it is merely a voice. It’s not just a device that presents information.
Seek out wonderful friends-the company you keep also influences your level of negativity. Cease associating with individuals who bolster your feelings of insecurity. Seek out friends who possess a positive perspective on life. Their uplifting energy will resonate with you. Explore gatherings focused on personal growth and spirituality for individuals with similar interests.
Embrace the power of learned optimism-countless reasons exist to adopt a negative outlook. Nonetheless, there are countless reasons to maintain a positive outlook. Rather than attempting to suppress negative thoughts, focus on engaging in more positive self-talk. Lift your spirits, as you have a friend. Inspire yourself and maintain an optimistic perspective on life.
Embrace gratitude-often, negativity stems from feelings of inadequacy. Instead of lamenting your lacks, appreciate what you have. Consider maintaining a journal, ideally on your phone, with a reminder to document all the things you are grateful for each day.
Consider volunteering; we often feel insufficient in our own lives, trapped in a bubble, unaware that there are others who share similar experienc es. Working with others helps you see how big the world is compared to your own problems. It fosters a positive mindset, which is beneficial.
Understand that everyone has imperfections-our thoughts tend to focus on our shortcomings. It’s important to acknowledge this and accept that having imperfections is perfectly fine. Embrace yourself completely and understand that your weaknesses do not define your identity. Concentrate on identifying and leveraging your strengths instead.
Concentrate on your life-I continue to experience negative thoughts, and I will likely carry them with me for the rest of my days. Waiting for them to stop before I begin living is a form of oblivion. Stop waiting for your thoughts to change. Begin by establishing goals and actively pursuing what you desire. Begin to embrace life and move beyond the confines of your thoughts.
So, friends! Let’s untie these knots of doubt before they become painful. By keeping our mind in the will of that God, let us live life free from doubt and with upright conduct and good thinking. We all say that life is four days long. We should live life to the fullest, but when our turn comes, we always stay tense, allowing doubt to poison our thoughts. We neither live life well for ourselves nor allow others to live it. Always be happy… Continue to smile, continue to love yourself and others, learn to forgive, respect, and pray!
(The author is a veteran journalist and freelance writer based in Brampton)
