Er. Jitender Kohli
It is a fact that the old age is the nearly wrecked stage of the life but this can be sweetly lived with a changed attitude and young mind. The physical changes are a routine process of scientific function of the variant part of the body as the inner part of the skin stops its growth and reduces its resistance results in formation of the wrinkles on the upper layer of the skin. The muscles start weakening, veins turns hard reducing the blood circulation, hollow created in the bones, pains in the joints, reduction of the digestion process, reduces appetite, reducing the vision (cataract or retinopathy), high blood pressure and weaken function of fluid formation system (catabolism), degeneration in the brain reduces the memory, hearing system reduces, reflexes gives way results in isolation from the social activities and birth to irritated reactions.
These physical changes start damaging self-confidence and create depression in the mind of the person. This compounds the complicacies if this person is ignored in the family. Such person starts mentally depressed adopting the negative attitude towards his existence. Inferiority complex starts dominating finding the companions, friends leaving their worldly existence. The opposite attitude of life begins to let believe that we are no more loved or respected finding us at the last edge of the life.
Such circumstances complicate the thinking and mind status turning to complete negative attitude that we are unwanted character on the earth, unwanted figure in the society, spent force declared by the family and useless figurer in the social society. The existent physical body frame slowly appearing as skelton and the life is just one step behind the disappearing from the planet settles as a damaging belief in the mind.
But this all is not if we properly analyse, In fact the defeat always generates from the mind, it accepts the defeat and we surrender. Feed your mind with the other factual of the life. Till today we had been living for the family and the society but now we are to live for ourselves. The old age is not a curse but a treasure of our hard work and collected heap of our experiences. This is the ripe fruit of our labourous life we spent surrounded by our own of many shapes and shades. This stage is packed with healthy wisdom, sweetness of experiences, utility of analysing and depth of thinking to live. This is an age in which many have achieved scientific inventions, political status, stage and media working and spiritual heights. This is lack of application and aptitude that we initiate surrendering our physical existence, mental stature, fearing deceases, helplessness and treat this stage as a curse of the life.
We must hold fast that we are not totally a spent force; we have not lost our entire abilities. We require reorganising our aptitude and attitude to adjust our self with the physical and environmental changes. In old age, to attain living urge, our utility and honourable adjustability in the family, attraction and sweet relationship we have to work for very few principals for the existence. We are to maintain our health to resist the ailments normally starts at this stage of life. Vision and movement remains if not perfect but at least worth use without others involvement. Busy yourself physically with the routine working around. Kitchen gardening, helping the grand-children in their educational functioning, teaching them the glory of our ancestors, assisting family in normal outdoor works and having soft touch with them without interfering in their living style. Next generation has different attitude because of the scientific developments, change in the educational system, society environment and variant requirements than our period left behind. The study of religious literature, writing and joining social services keeps mental stature healthy and keeps movement alive which is the basic strength of the life.
To keep all these activities we are to keep our financial status worth living even if not very healthy. The existence of a family in this society is based on his financial security. The rising graph of the all-round prices and the living necessities upsets the family budget making the next generation handicap to properly look after their elder even if they heartily desire to do so. We must release a part of our routine expenditures burden by keeping our old age financial stage alive. At least we should be capable to spend for our normal diet, medicine, social liabilities, religious trips and performing religious rites without overloading our children for it.
We are to change our living style and intermingle with our children and relatives without interfering in their own living style they selected to enjoy and live. We are to extend love to every one around only then we may get it in reciprocal. We are to discard the mind set for that we have done much to our own and are being ignored by them. This negative, thought may be true, but can not gain any peace or love for it. We are bound to throw it away to create peace in our mind to settle in a good atmosphere. We are to overlook even if the children are not performing their duties to us as the expectations simply bring shocks and depressions. We must let others to live as they desire. Our interference though may be in their interest mostly brings suspicions of crippling their freedom. This builds confused castle having no way-out to reach peaceful spot. We are to cultivate habit of feeling satisfied environment even if this may not be so by moving along our family generating parallel thoughts which have no interception or obstruction of any type. This shall provide us a satisfying life gaining respects from our children more so we shall find our grand-children close to us. In such effort we shall be able to have a calm and satisfying place at home which let us to have our time for the meditation.
The life has segments of birth, childhood, youth, middle age, old age and finally death. We observe these changes in the seed, growing plants, soft green leaves turning yellow and dropping from the branch of the tree. This is similarity of human life with the nature. We must prepare our self to welcome this practical realty. Growing age must attain detachment from the materialistic lusts and greed. The blind love to our family, lustful desires and thrust of power must be kept apart as we know we have enjoyed enough in the spent long years of age and it requires the remaining short period to achieve the blessings of the almighty by trying to narrow the gap we have with him. The meditation, good thoughts, helping activities and studying the religious literature shall open a smooth footpath to ultimate destination of the human. Such feelings and our practical efforts can bring a satisfying peace to our old age days to enjoy till we breathe last. The faith, dedication and devotion to almighty is the only an alternate to our lusty life we had carried along to this last stretch of our existence on this planet.
This is the only peace we can attain as no where else the peace exists for us to grab. Contribute maximum possible at the golden period of the old age which none can snatch nor any other stage can replace it. The final stage of life is most valuable worth enjoying and celebrating to the best extent we may hold. This all is taught, written and narrated by many saints, intellectuals and philosophers urging to follow.
(The author is senior columnist, Ex- State Press & Publicity Secretary; VHP J&K State Unit)