If we know how to listen to people, we can bring a lot of relief to their suffering. When people feel understood, we have already defused the bomb, says THICH NHAT HANH
I would like to tell you how I practice when I get angry. During the war in Vietnam there was a lot of injustice and many thousands of my friends and disciples were killed. I got very angry. One time I learnt that Ben Thuy, a city in Vietnam with 300,000 people, was bombarded by American artillery just because some guerrillas came to the city and tried to shoot down an American aircraft. They did not succeed, but the city was destroyed.
Look Closer
The American official responsible later declared that he had to destroy Ben Thuy in order to save it. I was very angry. But at that time I was already a solid practitioner. I did not say anything or act because I knew that acting or saying things while you are angry is not wise. It may create a lot of destruction.
I went back to myself, recognising my anger, embracing it and looked deep into the nature of my suffering. I saw that the source of our suffering was not the American soldiers. The American young men sent to Vietnam to kill and be killed underwent a lot of suffering. Their suffering continues even today. I could see that our suffering came from a kind of policy that is not wise, a misunderstanding or insecurity.
Many of us in Vietnam had to self-immolate in order to call for a cessation of the destruction. We did not want to inflict pain on other people, we wanted to take the pain on ourselves in order to get the message across. But the sound of mortars and bombs was too loud. Not many could hear us.
So I decided to go to America and call for a cessation of the violence. That was in 1966 and I was prevented from going back home and I began my exile since then.
Because I was able to see that the real enemy of man is not men, but it is ignorance, discrimination, fear, craving and violence, I did not feel any hate towards Americans.
-Thich Nhat Hanh